A few days ago, we discussed what a perfect woman looks like according to the book, The Perfect Woman, written by Mary R. Melendy, M.D., PhD. Today, I’m sharing Dr. Melendy’s beauty secrets for getting that perfect woman glow.

First, find a rubber hose and shove it up your nose. According to Dr. Melendy, flushing the body with water from the inside out will make you robust, hence, giving you a healthy glow. I thought doing things like that would cause a nosebleed, but what do I know, she’s a doctor and I’m just a nurse. She also suggests hiring a chambermaid to hose you down with cold water. I recommend that you stand inside of a tub before your chambermaid administers this treatment, otherwise you’ll have a mess on your hands. The woman in the illustration is not standing in a tub. I guess back then, being beautiful didn’t mean you had to be smart, just subservient to your husband’s will.

Dr. Melendy said that bathing is an essential part to being beautiful.

Here are Dr. Melendy’s rules about taking a bath:

1) Take a bath when you’re warm. After you take a bath, exercise. Sweat makes you glow.
2) Do not eat two hours before, or one hour after bathing.
3) The best times for bathing are at 10 a.m., 3 p.m., and at bedtime. Every full bath should be taken quickly, and should be followed by a vigorous rubdown, and exercising.
4) Wet the head and chest before bathing to prevent colds.

Dr. Melendy said that a woman’s hair is her glory. She tells readers that brushing their hair everyday will remove dust, thereby preventing dandruff, and she suggests that readers shampoo their hair with Green’s soap, pure Castile soap, Woodbury’s tar soap, and Pear’s soap. Castile soap is great stuff. When I was a nursing student, we used Castile soap as a shampoo in the hospital, and we still use it when we give soap water enemas. I know, too much information.

I will be posting more tips later. Next time, we will discuss perfect motherhood.