A Health Tip For Men

27Apr2007 Author: Mother Jones, RN

Gentlemen, I want to share this with you because the information it contains may one day save your life. I received it in an email from my mother the other day, and I think every man should carry a copy of these instructions with him at all times. By following these directions you will survive “that time of the month.”

Buy a bottle of wine and enjoy your weekend.

20 Responses to “A Health Tip For Men”

Cliffie
April 27th, 2007 at 8:46 am
Hey Mom, I was disappointed when I thought you had killed this one. How many patients land in the psych ward because they are living with a person of the other sex who might as well be speaking Klingon?
poody
April 27th, 2007 at 12:19 pm
this is a must have for all hetrosexual men
~Autumn
April 27th, 2007 at 7:04 pm
Step 1: copy instructions to Word
Step 2: Push Print
Step 3: Tape to husband’s forehead.

Thanks MJ!
Anonymous
April 28th, 2007 at 12:58 am
So when a guy gets sick, like once in a zillion years, you women berate males as being weak, babyish and generally “unable to handle adversity!!!” And yet whenever you get your period; males are to bow to your inner hormone and pander to your every demon.
So why the dichotomy? Seems to me that the pussification of American males, by feminazis is alive and well.

Steve
alphabet soup
April 28th, 2007 at 5:28 am
‘Have some more wine’ – the panacea for all ills. I love that idea.
On a more serious note Mother Jones, I would like to link your previous post to my Soup du Jour.
Ms Soup
Mother Jones RN
April 28th, 2007 at 5:56 am
Alphabet Soup: Thank you for linking my post to your blog.

Steve: I can’t explain the hormone dichotomy that you have so aptly pointed out. It’s just one of the world’s mysteries that no one has been able to explain.

MJ
Bohemian Road Nurse...
April 28th, 2007 at 9:22 am
That’s the funniest thing I’ve ever seen! Wish I’d had it for my ex-husbands!

Would somebody please give Anonymous (Steve) that card? But first, add the following lines, just for him:

Dangerous: Saying men only get sick “once in a zillion years”;

Safer: I am weak, babyish and unable to handle adversity;

Safest: Please allow me to to bow to your inner hormone and pander to your every demon;

Ultra-Safe: I am a pussy….
Jean-Luc Picard
April 28th, 2007 at 10:00 am
How well would it be to say “I don’t like wine.”
may
April 28th, 2007 at 7:14 pm
my husband will feel so defeated. because i don’t drink wine
Anonymous
April 29th, 2007 at 12:24 am
No Bohemian Road Nurse; not a pussy. Just a tired old motorcycle riding farm boy that is fed up with gender bashing.

Steve
Bohemian Road Nurse...
April 29th, 2007 at 1:48 am
To Steve:

It’s just a joke—so don’t take it so seriously. Even motorcycle dudes joke about women in that “gender-bashing” way. I used to be married to a biker and we ladies learned to take the gender bashing jokes in stride. (My ex used to have a t-shirt that said: “If you can see this, the bitch fell off….”) (I didn’t mind that one, but the one that said: “If I throw a stick will you run away” DID bug me somewhat….)
The Angry Medic
April 29th, 2007 at 10:31 am
Bohemian: Ouch, Bohemian, ouch! And “If you can see this, the bitch fell off….”?!

You are HEE-larious sometimes, you know

Momma Jones: Why didn’t you enter my life earlier? This would’ve saved my life so many times
Smalltown RN
April 29th, 2007 at 12:49 pm
I am giving this one to my hubby…..
AzRN
April 29th, 2007 at 4:36 pm
Jean-Luc & May-

I think it would be safe (and permissible) to substitute any one of the following for wine: chocolate, buying new or more clothes, or “sure honey, we can sit here and talk.”

Would you agree Mama Jones?
Mother Jones RN
April 30th, 2007 at 1:24 am
AzRN: Agreed. I’d also like to add “Yes, dear. Whatever you say, dear” to the list.

Angry Medic: I wish I had met you sooner, too. We can thank Kim at emergiblog for getting us together. She’s the one who talked me into starting my blog:-)

MJ
scalpel
April 30th, 2007 at 10:59 am
I thought it was funny.
Shrinked Immaculate
May 1st, 2007 at 7:31 am
Echo Angry Medic’s words. I needed that much earlier. now its too late. Wistful sigh.
The Curmudgeon
May 1st, 2007 at 12:30 pm
“Whatever you say, dear” is fraught with its own perils — if the tone and inflection aren’t just right there can be seriuos repurcussions.

Stick to wine. Or the potable of your spouse’s choice.
MadMike
May 1st, 2007 at 3:44 pm
Marvelous! I am going to steal this MJ. I hope you don’t mind:-) It is just too good to pass up…..

Wine anyone?
Forgotten Blue Line
May 2nd, 2007 at 11:08 pm
When I was younger I lived my mother and two sisters. Their biological clocks did merge so I was in danger 3 weeks a month more if they were milking it. I just fed them salty snacks. It made them thirsty, but I rather them be mad about there being nothing to drink then at me.

Also don’t get me started about the weird looks I got at the store buying boxes and boxes of pads and tampons with chips.