Hospital administrators all over the country are trying to figure out how to keep their nurses happy. Some are even hiring expensive consulting firms in order to find out what’s on our mind. People, this isn’t rocket science. All you have to do is ask. Personally, I think that the nursing shortage would resolve itself overnight if Google started running hospitals.

Imagine a chair like this at the nurses station. Google takes the welfare of its employees seriously. This decompression (stress) capsule is impermeable to sound and light. I can see myself crawling into one of these chairs when I’m stressed out. Sorry everyone, I’m taking a timeout.

Does your back hurt after transferring patients in and out of bed all day long? Google’s employee health department has the answer to your aches and pains. Professional masseurs, also known as eusses, are available to help Google employees get through their day.

I hate waiting to get on a crowded elevator, especially when it’s lunchtime. Look at this young lady entering the Google cafeteria. Google installed slides and fire poles, allowing employees to get around in a flash. Google serves good food, too. Employees can eat all they want from a vast choice of food and drink.

This is my favorite goodie from Google. These are private cabins where employees can attend to personal affairs. No more sneaking off to make personal phone calls. Some people might suggest that Google’s way of doing business would never work in a hospital. Google is different. After all, what kind of people enjoy working in an office building that looks like the inside of a big plastic gerbil cage? On the other hand, maybe that’s why Google would be good at running hospitals. Nurses are accustom to being treated like rodents by hospital administrators, so we would naturally feel at home within our new working environment.

I know that Google loves nurses. A couple of years ago, they chose Nurse Ratched’s Place a as a Blog of Note.

I wonder if Google is looking for a nurse blogger.