This lady reminds me of my old school librarian. She taught my classmates and me about library etiquette. The number one rule involved silence. Silence was not only golden, it was a requirement if you didn’t want to get thrown out of the library. That’s not the case anymore. Today, the library is about as quiet as a Wal-Mart Superstore.

Case in point. I’m currently sitting at my local library with small children running all around me while their mothers are talking on their stupid cell phones. Excuse me, but when did it become OK to jabber on a cell phone while your kids are running wild in public? And then there is the guy sitting directly behind me in a cubical. He is also running his mouth on a cell phone. Allow me to recap his conversation. (I wonder if he would stop using his cell phone in the library if he knew that he was the subject of today’s post).

First the guy calls his insurance agent and reports that his car was in an accident over the weekend. Apparently the guy’s lovely teenage daughter stole the keys to the car again, and went joyriding with her friends. I heard the guy tell his insurance agent that he hid the keys to the car in the mudroom, but that his little angel had snuck out of the house in the middle of the night after finding the car keys in an old shoe. Then I heard him say that everyone in the car was hurt and that his daughter is still in the hospital. She has broken bones and internal injuries. After a long pause, I heard him making excuses for his daughter’s irresponsible behavior. Poor baby. It’s not her fault that she lied to her parents, and nearly killed herself along with her friends. I’m sure it won’t be long before his sweet angel makes her way onto my unit with a diagnosis of conduct disorder. Then I heard him call his business partner. He told his partner to write a check out to someone for half a million dollars. Then he told his partner not to sign the check before he sent it out in the mail. Sweet.

Where are those mean looking librarians that use to tell noisy patrons to shut up. I’m going to buy this teeshirt. What do you think?