Martha’s List

21 Aug 2006

Off with their heads! I’m still waiting for Blogger.com to get their act together. Every time I try to post a picture, my browser crashes. I use Safari OSX. This makes me a very unhappy princess-nurse. (Since I can’t upload pictures, visualize a picture of a pouting princess- nurse, wearing her crown, standing by a guillotine).

Speaking of royalty, the queen of domestic perfection, Martha Stewart, published another “to do” list in this month’s edition of Martha Stewart Living magazine. Sorry Martha, I don’t have time to dust my ceilings, walls, and baseboards this month, or any other month this century. I’ll never forget when Martha, the poster child for OCD, instructed readers to rotate their lampshades. Martha explained that this would allow their lampshades to fade more evenly as sunlight came through their windows. Maybe next month Martha’s personal “to do” list can include getting a prescription for Paxil. It’s an effective medication for OCD. (Visualize a picture of a happy, relaxed Martha Stewart, standing in a messy house surrounded by dusty ceilings, walls, and baseboards). Paxil, it’s a good thing!

This is NOT a Kodak moment.

20 Aug 2006

Blogging without pictures is like a day without shopping. It sucks! For some reason, I can’t upload pictures to my blog. I hate this. If I could upload pictures, I’d show you one of me pulling my hair out.

I worked another 16 hour shift yesterday, and as usual, it wasn’t any fun. My boss called to let me know that, if I needed her, I could reach her on her cell phone. She said she was going to a dinner party with her family. She sounded happy and stress-free. I was stressed out when she called, and ready to start looking for a new job. Oh well, at least she called.

I work an 8 hour shift today, and then I can get back to non-stop blogging until next weekend.

Hospital Doctor

18 Aug 2006

Holy cow, what’s going on here? Liveright Publishing Corporation first published this book in 1938. Pyramid Books republished it in 1952.

Exposed!

“A doctor and a nurse embraced in the dusky shadows of the gray walled room, their bodies entwined, their lips pressed together. Suddenly there were footsteps in the corridor….somebody opened the door and turned on the light….

Hospital Doctor takes you into the private world of doctors and mistresses, nurses and lovers—an amazing world of heroes and heels who are tempted by pretty faces and a craving for cash.

From the incisive pen of a surgeon himself comes the shocking truth behind many of the operations performed annually which lead to mayhem and manslaughter; the startling expose of underpaid interns and ruthless physicians who resort to shameless practices and character assassination in their ambitious quests for fame and money.”

I got halfway through the first chapter of Hospital Doctor and couldn’t stop laughing. Nurses don’t have time to go to the bathroom, let alone time to play “doctor” with a doctor. See the nurse in the doorway. She’s telling her coworker that she better get back to the unit because all of her patients are on their call light, wanting pain medication. I wonder how she keeps her cap from flying off her head while she’s making out with her boyfriend.

In chapter one, the main character, a doctor, is portrayed as a god, while the supporting characters, the nurses, are portrayed as brainless tramps. And of course, all the brainless-tramp nurses want to marry an oversexed doctor. Now why would anyone want to marry a guy that chases skirts around a nurse’s station? Maybe these nurses are brainless. I love how the author, a surgeon, claimed that his porno book was an exposé about the health care system. Too bad the guy isn’t around today, blogging on the Internet. I’m sure he would make us all blush.

The only thing I find appealing about this book is the cover. I love trashy artwork on book covers from the 1950s.

My Yoga Class

17 Aug 2006

I signed up for my yoga class today. Too bad I can’t get this guy as my teacher. He’s cute, and he’s holding his class on a beach. Lord, I think I’ve enrolled in the wrong school.

I started back to school three years ago to earn my journalism degree. The day I signed up for my first classes, my college guidance counselor told me I had to take a gym class. I informed him I was too old to wear gym shorts and play dodge ball with a bunch of kids. My counselor assured me that they had classes designed for the “mature student.” That’s code for old geezer. And that’s me, an old nurse who wants to keep learning.

Oh yeah, my boss is paying for my class. It’s tuition reimbursement great. Score one for the geezer!

The Home Life of a Princess-Nurse

16 Aug 2006

Some days I feel like Snow White. I live with prince charming in the woods, and woodland creatures, including my three dogs and two cats, surround me. However, that’s where the similarities end. I don’t live with seven dwarfs, and I’d be telling you a fairytale if I said I was a domestic diva like Snow White. She liked cleaning and cooking all day, while I like reading my books and blogging. It’s a good thing my prince charming cooks, or else we’d starve.

Unfortunately, I have to leave Nurse-Princess Land today and report to my nursing unit. I’m picking up extra time at work so my family and I can keep the lifestyle we’ve become accustomed to, you know, like being able to eat and put gas in the royal carriages. I’ll be OK tonight as long as I don’t bite into any poison apples.

Note to self: Do not accept fruit from strangers.

A princess-nurse’s work in never done.

Daisy Downer Day

15 Aug 2006


I hate starting off by being a Daisy Downer, but so far my day sucks! I started my day with a trip to the dentist’s office. I now have a temporary crown, and 1,200 fewer dollars in my bank account. Oh yeah, that’s after my pathetic dental insurance pays its part of the bill. But wait, there’s more. I get to go back in ten days for an encore performance when I will receive my permanent crown. Oh Lord, my mouth hurts. Well, at least it gives me an excuse to dive into an ice cream sundae minus the nuts. I’ll just be eating soft food today.

Yesterday, I received some books I won on e-Bay. I’ll be sharing them with you soon. They are offbeat romance novels about, what else—horny, lecherous doctors, and hot, oversexed nurse.

The War Against Nurses

14 Aug 2006

  • Salon.com The War Against Nurses by Diana Reiss-Koncar
  • In 2001, Salon.com published “The War Against Nurses” by Diana Reiss-Koncar. According to the article, assaults on R.N.s are at an all-time high, and nurses who complain or seek help risk loosing their jobs. Since its publication, and the publication of countless other articles on the subject, little has been done to protect nurses from assault in health care facilities, and hospitals continue to blame the victims of assault.

    I’ve been attacked many times over the years at work, and each time my employer would ask, “What could you have done differently to prevent the attack?” The last time I was attacked, I became angry when my boss asked me that moronic question, but instead of sulking, I took action. I filed charges against my patient. Eventually, the person was found guilty of second-degree assault, and sentenced to ten years in jail and was fined $25,000. During the process, I educated a judge about workplace violence at my hospital, and since then, several local nurses have taken abusive patients to court.

    Have you ever been assaulted at work? How did your employer respond to the attack?

    Bedtime Story

    13 Aug 2006


    “Bedtime Story” by Jim Daly

    Once upon a time, there was a princess-nurse who worked a 16-hour shift every Saturday. She would leave her castle at 7:00 a.m. and wouldn’t return home until 1:00 a.m. the next morning. Needless to say, when she returned to her castle, she was a tired and cranky princess-nurse. Unlike her friend, the princess who couldn’t sleep with a pea under her mattress, the princess-nurse, who was exhausted when she returned home from work, could fall asleep on a bed of nails.

    The princess-nurse hopes that fairytales really do come true, and that one day she won’t have to work ridiculous hours anymore.

    Nite-nite.

    I love stuff.

    10 Aug 2006

    “Fiesta Pig” by Andy Warhol

    If you haven’t already figured it out, I love collecting stuff. I haunt thrift stores, garage sales, and I’m an accomplished dumpster driver. It’s amazing what unsuspecting people throw out. I once found a first edition book in someone’s trash worth A LOT of money. My favorite stuff includes books, art, and Fiesta dinnerware. So it only makes sense that my all time favorite Andy Warhol screenprint is “Fiesta Pig,” created in 1979. If I ever find this screenprint in someone’s trash, they’ll never be able to revive me.

    Shopping for stuff relaxes me. I get lost in my thoughts and enjoy the day. Many times, I go shopping with my husband, who also loves stuff. He and I make a dynamic shopping team. However, there is a downside to going out in public, and that is running into former patients. Don’t get me wrong, I like seeing my patients, but it’s awkward, especially with all the privacy rules nurses have to deal with at work. I never go up to a former patient, I wait for them to talk to me. I let the other person decide how they want to handle the situation.

    How do you handle seeing a former patient out in public, and who else likes to collect stuff?

    M.D. Most Wanted

    9 Aug 2006

    M.D. Most Wanted. The title reminds me of Doctor A when he was missing in action last weekend. But this M.D. is a hot little stud puppy—with broad shoulders—that falls for a superstar who comes into his life via the hospital’s emergency room.

    “From the moment she was rushed into Blair Memorial’s emergency room, Dr. Reese Bendenetti’s famous new patient turned his solitary life upside down. For the first time, this dedicated surgeon was beginning to wonder if healing others might not be fulfillment enough.

    London Merriweather’s world of wealth and privilege could not have been more foreign to him. Yet, as he came to know the vulnerable woman behind the glittering façade, he longed to bring her into his world.

    But a crazed killer was stalking her—and before Reese dared to dream of a future with her, he had to make sure she lived to see tomorrow.

    Born to heal, destined to fall in love!”

    Good grief. I must be working at a very dull hospital. The most drama I ever see is when two visitors fight over the last space in the hospital’s parking lot. Surely Dr. Stud Puppy’s office manager is having a fit because he’s out tracking down a stalker instead of tackling the mountain of paperwork he left on his desk. So much for the doctor’s professional boundaries.

    Kt has tagged me, so here we go with today’s answers to the pressing questions regarding my reading habits.

    1) One book that changed your life: 9 ½ Mystics, The Kabbala Today by Herbert Weiner.

    2) One book you have read more than once: To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee.

    3) One book you would want to read on a desert island: All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque.

    4) One book that made you laugh: The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain.

    5) One book that made you cry: There are two books that always make me cry. They are Night by Elie Wiesel and The Painted Bird by Jerzy Kosinski.

    6) One book you wish had been written: That elusive “how to raise your kid” instruction manual, the book that should come with every newborn baby.

    7) One book you wish you had written: The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck.

    8) One book you wish had never been written: I agree with Kt, The Atkin’s Diet Book.

    9) One book you are currently reading: Blogging for Dummies by Brad Hill. I refer to it anytime I have a technical question about blogging. I am a BIG dummie when it comes to computer stuff. Thank God for Mac tech support.

    10) One book you have been meaning to read. Tuesdays with Morrie: An Old Man, a Young Man, and Life’s Greatest Lesson by Mitch Albom.

    Thanks for tagging me, it was fun. How does this game work? If everyone has been tagged, do I make up a new list of questions and tag someone else?

    Nurse Ratched

    There has been a lot of chatter in the blogosphere about medical bloggers and HIPAA regulations so let me make this very clear: I write composite stories about many different people that I've cared for over the years.

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    Amanda Trujillo, MSN, RN, DNSc-NP(s) Media & Blogger Coverage